Self Knowledge

O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us
To see oursels as others see us!


Thus wrote the great Scots poet Robert Burns and how insightful those words are. Although each of us is the one person we should know better than all others, this is frequently not the case. Sometimes we are too hard on ourselves and far too self-critical but at others the reverse is true. We make too many excuses instead of trying harder to overcome our weaknesses. It is only human to do so of course but the ironic thing is, most of us find it very difficult to afford the same privilege to other people. The main problem with self-knowledge is that we ourselves are too close to the source. As the old adage puts it; “We can’t see the wood for the trees.”

Although we are all prone to make hasty judgements, when indeed we should be trying to avoid passing judgement at all, other people can usually see to the heart of us more clearly than we can ourselves. It is possible to ‘put on an act’ and fool some people but it has been truly said in relation to politics that: You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time. People judge us more by our actions than our words and this is sensible for many there are who pay lip service with a form of words but whose actions belie those words. In relation to ourselves, we should be able to avoid being taken in by the words but it is true to say I think that many of us fool ourselves into ignoring that our actions do not match them.

In my experience, most people are quite generous in their assessments of us and although there are exceptions, those who never seem able to think good about anyone, this is not generally true. If people in general gain the impression that you are a good and kind person, they will be approaching close to the truth about you. As indeed will those who gain the impression that you are vain, or boastful, or over-materialistic, etc. There may well be errors of detail in these assessments but overall, they will be fairly accurate. I am talking here of course of people we know very well, not casual acquaintances. It is not always possible to discover exactly what people do think about us, as they tend not to share such opinions with the person concerned. This is where a good friend is so vitally important. A good friend will be able to tell us everything, good, bad and indifferent, without endangering their friendship. Unless we are willing to allow a good friend to do this, then we don’t have a good friend.

Why is self-knowledge so important? Each one of us is unique and although our differences may appear slight, they are vital. We have been born with certain gifts, certain strengths, certain weaknesses. In order to obtain the best from our lives on earth, “filling the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run,” as Rudyard Kipling puts it in his poem “IF,” we need to work within our limitations and to our strengths. If we don’t know what they are, how can we do so? In order to truly know ourselves we have to recognise that we are very complex individuals and are much more than our physical body. Indeed, the physical body is the least part that goes to make up the real person. If we wish to know who we are and to obtain help in working to our strengths and eradicating our weaknesses, we need to deal with our mind and our spirit. The most effective method for doing this is to use meditation. However, being able to trust a friend to tell us what they think our strengths and weaknesses are can be a good starting point. Meditation is about stilling the mind and allowing the inner, Higher self, to come to the surface. There, in that Higher self, we find the true you and the true me. There also, we gradually unveil our purpose or purposes in choosing to live this earthly life.

So, if you say “Amen” to Rabbie Burns’ cry for help, look within.